Saturday, April 4, 2009

My latest impractical plan for saving the world

The world is currently a sad place. There is recession looming everywhere, terrorists are havign the time of their lives blowing up people every other day, and roger federer failed to win yet another tournament.
In these times of grave crisis, i come as a messiah of hope. Here goes my plan for eliminating recession and bringing peace to India. Like most ideas, this one isint original, but has  cleverly been tweaked so that any claim on the idea, in case it goes on to win me the nobel peace prize, would be seen as merely yet another zietgiest.
For starters, lets find some country that terrorists ( like al qaeda, US govt, or Investment bankers) would never target. Lets take the swiss, for example. Those neutral bastards found the perfect scam to avoid being attacked by terrorists or dictators. Thats called good defense strategy. 
Obviously, it is impossible for India to stage the neutral scam, although not for lack of trying. Take the case of hospitals. Rarely would one hear of a hospital being blown up ( except in case of 'joker' of the Batman: Dark knight fame). Even terrorists try to avoid that sort of target. My plan is to make India the country to look up to when there is an emergency. With the right foriegn policy, India could become the country to fall back upon. 
The problem is, India is neither a supremely rich country that can afford to aid monetarily, nor is it a superpower so it can support militarily. The one thing that we do have in excess, however,  is population. We could have a national disaster relief consortium, that goes to the various nations and provides the labour to rebuild it. This could be in the form of manual laborers or skilled ones. We could even customize it according to the GDP of the nation concerned and charge for our services. For example, Australia and Canada would be heavily charged, while it would be free for afghanistan. In the times of recession, this could provide the much needed job openings for people, and remove us as the target of radical groups.The lure of foriegn travel is also something that could be used to attract people to the job, not that they need it during these times. 
The great thing is, there is no shortage of disasters in the world. Thus, there would never be any actual joblessness.  The best part is that we could use the same in case we ever get struck by disaster. We would still need a big-ass military, just in case. But it would be efficient if they would be dual trained, for fighting and for disaster recovery. Foriegn policy is completely over rated :|

As most of my ideas are, this is probably unoriginal and completely impractical. I just think its interesting to think why. 


Full Of Life said...

I love your header!
@ the post, your impracticality is implied in the title of the post itself! Lol, it reminded me of the made-to-order-planet-factory they describe in Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy!
A compulsory read it is :P

fiddlesticks said...

The great thing is, there is no shortage of disasters in the world.
I find this hilarious. Is there something wrong with me?!

tata birla said...

yet another hitchhiker's omnipresent obfuscation @ fol :P

@ ms , i wrote that thing. With the adjective great . I sure as hell hope ur perfectly fine :D :P