Tuesday, July 8, 2008

The perfect weak

Ok , so what i though had been a near perfect week, what with the godlike GRE n all, turned out quite sour in the end. Primarily because, i found out, to my utter dismay, that i hate, repeat, h.a.t.e work. I hate jobs, and everything that comes along with it. And i had to find that out during my first day at my internship. No, not the 2nd day, not the 3rd, but the 1st. Someone up there was not happy with me having a perfect week, and voila ! No, the internship aint bad. In fact, to most, it would actually seem quite nice. The people are very friendly, my instructor is quite cool, and despite his insistence on completing all the formalities like di-ary, quiz et cetera according to schedule, he is quite a nice,understanding and cool guy, one who, im sure, wont give anyone a B grade for reaching ps a minute late. No, i simply hate it. I guess its like hating having a martian frog liver for breakfast. especially if ur a veggie. i surmise its inbuilt.

So lemme get back to the beginning. It had been a near perfect week. Maybe it would have stayed that way for another day, had i not checked my alternate email address that i never check usually, but which i had given for internship communication,. Any intuition that had no doubt played a mega role in the gre earlier that week mysteriously disappeared and i did check the fateful mail that spoiled my entire sense of euphoria, actually, completely destroyed it. I had gotten a mail from the instructor, that among other things , mentioned that i had to wear formals for work. formals ! that unheard of thing that strikes fear in the most intrepid person (read: me ). I dont own anything close to formal. Unless you count that suit, which i bought out of compulsion. So here goes all my euphoria, and along with it , my glorious week. So mum drags me to one of those never-before-stepped-into formals shops . The nightmare begins.

Now on to the travel. Forty minutes is what i had thought i would have to endure. Of course, the FM radio would provide some relief. Then came the double-triple-quadruple-penta-hex-hepta-etcetra blows. I get stuck in a traffic jam for an hour. My FM headset suddenly stops working.Reach registration an hour late. (which, by the way, was at a place diff from the internship place ) Which actually lasted all of 5 minutes. Then got sent to the company. Then there was an attempt on my life. Then ... screeeeeeeeech. Attempt on my life ? u bet.

They tried to kill me. I escaped, greviously injured, holding a scar for life, but alive. Yes, i almost died. Of boredom. Yes it was the book that i still cant fathom what it is really about, if not beating around the bush trying to say ' Save electricity, Save electricity !'. To make matters worse, the returning traffic was even more horrible. All this on the first day. Blah ! I guess the only bright spot ultimately was during the weekend, when i decided to join CAT classes. No no, going to classes aint my idea of fun. The teacher is hot. Most people would join up just to attend her classes. Anyways, back to the more sombre topics.

I have already got a project allotted to me. here's the catch: Only i was allotted a project. Perhaps i nodded my head a lil bit too much when the project coordinator was speaking. And along with it, a three week deadline. At the end of which i have to give a seminar. The last time i heard, people were still undergoing orientation midway september last time in all ps stations. To top it, i have to share a PC for 2-3 weeks. I get to use it for half the time. Which means half the time i am not in front of the pc. Thats like depriving a crocodile of its teeth for half the day.
And so i stay in that damned place, all day. At the current rate, at the end of this sem, ill have spent more time in the office than i have totally spent in the institute building over the past 3 years. I get so bored, so zombie-ish, that i begin to see strange patterns in things that are usually not glanced upon. For eg, who in the world would give a rats ass for a book titled : 'beeeeeeeep' (censored due to excessive risk of falling inadvertently into the wrong hands) ? well, i had to study it and absorb all i could from it.
All that of course, was before i had found out about this glorious scheme that BEST ( the bus service in Mumbai ) had started a few months ago. Buy a 20 Rs ticket, and u can travel in any bus in any direction for any time for the entire day. So i dont have to wait for my single once-a-decade frequency bus, but can jump buses every two stops, and gleefully reach home. For the first time in ...err .. wait a minute .. its not years, not months, heavens, its been just a day ! Goddamnit , whatever! for the first time in the day, i felt free. Free to get into whatever bus i like, choose the empty bus going someplace iv never heard of, over the overly crowded bus i would usually get into, and all that without taking out the wallet and handing over to the conductor anything. In fact, i quite enjoyed the power of the one, that enabled me to flash it like a VIP flashing his Identity and enter into any bus of my choice. Dang, i sound like one of those employees who have to resort to such things to give them happiness.

Therefore, i have already begun counting my remaining days in the ps station. Thats my best bet at maintaining my sanity. I just want it to end. Fast. And then i can go back to my sleeping-gaming-nowork ritual in campus.
Now i truly understand Dilbert. Iv got to read it again. ciao ( or whatever it is zombies use to sign off) !


9 said...

hahah! i'll read this one again ;) :)

Full Of Life said...

LOLmax only. Well written, I guess I have a vague idea of the impending doom in January for me. :P

fiddlesticks said...

No! You'll come back and start a Save The Planet campaign, won't you, oink? I volunteer to be one of your offshore managers :D

Prachi Bansal said...

hahahhaha...FORMALS!! lol lol

kniOledge ( Oink ) said...

@9 :D
@fol impending doom ? wat u talkin abt , ur prolly goin abroad or smthin for ps !
@fiddle in case i do start a 'Save the Planet' campaign, what guarantee do i have that the offshore manager is not simply star gazing ? :P

@ prachi : not to worry, i still havnt in-shirted, and next week im gonna try a Tee to ps \m/